Charlotte's Web: The Right Book at the Right Time - Stories for the Nine Year Change

Bedtime story time has evolved from year to year at my house. My children are now 9 (almost 10) and 14. I believe that bedtime rituals are still just as important as ever - including the bedtime story. During the school year, we used the Oak Meadow Folk Tales book for most bedtime stories. I wondered if my son was still enjoying the nightly ritual or if, at nine years old, he was growing out of it.
Imagine my delight when a mother of one of his friends came by to see me one and day and asked if I could tell her what folk tale book we had been reading. She had heard my son telling her son about it in the car when she was taking them on an outing recently. She reported that my son had gone into great detail about the stories and the candle we lit when we sat down to read. Her son had later asked to begin this ritual. Apparently, nine year old boys still love bedtime stories!
I was amazed that he had shared this with a friend. Not only did he love the ritual, he felt confident about sharing it. I have to admit that my storyteller heart rejoiced.
As the school year wound to a close, I realized that there were several books that I had hoped to read aloud that we just had not been able to squeeze in. With the farming theme present in the third grade year, I decided we just couldn't leave off without reading Charlotte's Web. I knew he had heard it read aloud when he was younger and his sister was listening to it, but I love that book so much, I decided to try it and see what happened.
Thus began a sweet and tender time for a mother and son in the midst of the nine year change. Each chapter is so real and so in tune to this time in a child's life. I could feel the authenticity of it as we read aloud each night before bed. As Wilbur matures and understands the facts about life, as Fern changes and leaves her barnyard friends behind - thus is the life of the nine year old. There are so many parallels in this story to the struggles of being nine. Children feel keenly this "dying" of early childhood and rebirth into the older child. Something about turning "double digits" is a rite of passage. I know that he had heard the basic story before and even remembered bits and pieces from hearing it read aloud years earlier. But, there is a magic in hearing the right story at the right time, an affirming of your inner life that you do not get from other tales. I felt privileged to watch it unfold. I urge parents not to push children to grow up too soon. Do not rush to read a book just because they "can" read the book and do not give up on bedtime stories. There is a magic in a story candle lit in a darkening room. A spell that weaves around the child when the story is a perfect match for the age and stage. This is the "sweet spot" of children's literature - bibliotherapy at its best.

Peace, Love, and The Woodland School Cooperative

For several years we have been involved with The Woodland School Homeschool Co-op. I cannot say enough good things about the wonder of bringing people together to learn in community. It is messy, it is difficult, it is tiring, and it is a many splendored thing.

My husband and I used to want to move to a communal living farm and hug trees and other people on a daily basis. A homeschool co-op can be kind of like this, minus the farm animals (though in some places, you could keep this aspect as well!)

I know this because we have experimented with communal living in several different ways over our 20 years together and I have experimented with homeschool co-ops for the past 13 years. I have a lot of experience with this "community" thing.

First of all, people are beautiful and complicated.  We all need each other to make good things happen here on earth. Recognizing and appreciating our individual geniuses can be a joyful discovery in a co-op. People are also messy and have a lot of baggage. All people, regardless of creed, nationality, political leanings, religious convictions or whatever have their "stuff", myself included. Not to mention personality types, levels of commitment to the group, ideas about education, ideas about parenting, ideas about everything. Throw in hormonal changes in children, teenagers, and the mom's and you pretty much have a perfect storm. I remember a song that I learned at Koinonia Farm, a communal farm we spent some time at in Georgia. It goes like this:

"Turn the other cheek and surprise the one that hits you, turn, turn, 

Turn the other cheek and surprise the one that hits you, turn, turn, turn.  

First the log and then the speck, first the log, and then the speck." 

This pretty much sums up the best rule of co-op life. Surprise your co-op sisters and brothers with an amazing capacity to turn the other cheek. I have never had anyone hit me at any homeschool co-op (unless, do toddlers count?), but the message of being able to turn away from misunderstanding or anger in the face of something you may take personally is a priceless piece of wisdom for co-op life (or life anywhere).

 

Which brings me to my second gem of wisdom about living in community. Assume positive intent. Always. These are three words that my family lives by. Do this and you may save nations - I am not kidding.

 

These little lessons with big implications are a bigger deal in terms of learning than any lab experiment or group project. We do the group projects and lab experiments, but the entire experience of learning as a community is the experiment. My daughter often says, "The journey is the destination." (I know she didn't make that one up, but she says it a lot.) Part of taking the journey in community is not being threatened by another person's ideas and values. You have to be strong enough in your own thinking to entertain other ideas without having to absorb them as your own or criticize someone else for holding them. This is crucial to a co-op experience that does not just scratch the surface of human relationships. We can all hang out with people just like us. It is boring, but we do it all the time. We tend to surround ourselves with people who think, act, dress, and talk just like we do. But, the gift of living in a true community is to get past that.

 

I know that the group we are in for this coming school year will look different at the end than at the beginning. The group may stay together, some may come and some may go. Some may have life experiences that take them elsewhere and some may love it and some may not. All of that is okay. The coming and the leaving, the loving it and not loving it are a part of the experience.  All of this and the way we react or don't react is an education.  The Woodland School is an experiment in community - a community with boys and girls, grown-ups and children, democrats and republicans (and some who don't know what we are), Christians and Jews, Evolutionists and Creationists, right and left, up and down, and some in the middle. This, my friends, is socialization at its finest. Just don't forget to turn the other cheek and assume positive intent.